I was back in town for the first time in years, my old neighborhood much like it was when I got the hell out a couple decades before. Rundown, shabby, poor, depressing as fuck. Nothing had changed except the faces, and the very few I recognized looked tired and worn out. It was here that I made the mistake of taking The Big Ride, though so far, my weakness has not come back to harm me. So far.

My name's Ham, short for Hamroy. Dunno where my mom came up with that, but I've been known as Ham since I was little. I grew up in a bad part of Pittsburgh, poor and black and no different than anyone else on our street. I got lucky when I started high school. My friends turned rough and dropped out but I had a knack for science and a teacher who kept me in classes, eventually finding me a scholarship which led to my hard-earned PhD in Biology. Unlike most of my classmates, I moved out and never looked back.

I married between my Masters and Doctorate programs, my wife Haney a fellow biologist. We had a great relationship and three kids later, were still very much in love and enjoying our lives in Miami, where I taught and she was a researcher. Our kids were late teens and soon to be moving away, and we were very ready to have some time to ourselves.

I almost destroyed all that on The Big Ride. It would still destroy me if Haney ever found out. I pray to God she does not.

I was back in Pittsburgh for a conference and looked up an old high school buddy I hadn't talked to since I left. A good friend who I hoped I couldn't contact. I hoped he'd moved out, like me, and found a better life for his family. Tony was easy to locate, however, and despite my disappointment that he was still in the hood, I dropped by to visit him after a day of work sessions and lectures.

Tony had bought into the rough and desperate lifestyle that caught so many of us young black kids. Money, drugs, women, a freewheeling way of living that had many highs and many more lows. He'd survived, barely, and I was not terribly shocked to find out that he ran both drugs and prostitutes. He toked up as we talked, drinking gin and tonic, and though I was very uncomfortable at first, I gave in and smoked weed with him while I sipped a beer.

Despite the years and the divergent lives we'd led since high school, Tony and I clicked back into our old routines and I admit it was nice to reconnect that easily with him. He had me laughing and remembering all the crazy shit we did, the times my momma or his smacked the hell out of us for something stupid we'd done. We agreed we had deserved every whooping and knew that if they'd have known it all, we'd still be walking funny.

There was a party at a place down the block and Tony wanted me to come. I was instantly opposed, already back deeper in the hood than I wanted to be. I didn't need to get caught up in any crazy shit the night before I flew back home to my family.

Tony was smooth, and I was buzzing from weed and alcohol, and I soon gave in and agreed. We walked down to the liquor store, picked up a few bottles of gin and rum and a handful of blunt wrappers. Tony rolled them up as I hit the john, and soon he had a half-dozen fat blunts ready to go. Liquor chilling in a cooler, we headed down the street to a house already banging with beats and people dancing.

It was an old-school house party, and I realized that I missed it a bit more than I had acknowledged. People were happy, guys enjoying the way a hot girl's ass jiggled as she danced, chicks checking out dudes with 6-packs and tats. The media makes it seem like every party in the hood is guns and fights and people crying and screaming and bleeding. Most of the time, it's just another party where drunk, horny people have a good time and get loose. That night was no different.

Tony and I squeezed into the house and found the host. I remembered the guy as someone who was at school briefly with me before he dropped out. He'd actually gone legit, running a wildly successful nightclub downtown. He had a house out west of the city, but kept this one to throw parties for his old neighborhood.

Tony fired up a couple of blunts and passed them into the grateful crowd before lighting a third to for us to walk around with. I met a lot of people I'll never remember and a couple I knew from way back. All evening, I got mellow and really enjoyed myself.

After midnight, I was starting to get tired, looked for Tony to let him know I was heading back to my hotel. When I found him, he was talking to another guy with very dark skin and braids, a wicked grin on his face. I heard Tony exclaim “No shit? Damn, it's been a while. Yeah. Hell Yeah, I'll take The Big Ride real quick.”

The other dude moved off and I walked over to Tony. “Bro,” he slung his arm around my shoulder, “I know you 'bout to tell me you leavin', but hang tight a bit, there's something you gotta see. Come on.”

Tony, drunk and very stoned, pulled me out of the house and down a few doors to a small, dark, and poorly-maintained house. He knocked quietly once, the door opened, and a slim guy hustled past and headed toward the party. Tony led me inside the dimly-lit room, old furniture and impersonal belongings randomly placed throughout. A couple of guys sat on a couch smoking a joint while a skinny chick alternated sucking their cocks.

I stumbled and almost ran, not wanting to see any more. Tony caught my arm. “Hang on, Ham, hang on. I know you're a married guy, I know. But you gotta come check this out down in the basement. A rite of passage you gotta watch.”

I protested and felt guilty already, thoughts of my wife and kids making me tense. Seeing the chick giving those guys blowjobs had my cock threatening to rise up, and I didn't want any temptation. It had been weeks since I'd fucked Haney as she went through a couple of surgeries and was still recovering. My willpower had always been strong, but at that moment, I knew I might give in.

Tony was insistent, practically dragging me back into the house, the thin woman slurping noisily on a cock while she jacked off the other, the guys passing a joint between them. They all ignored us as we headed to the stairs where we were passed by another guy heading out.

Before we were halfway down the basement, I could hear the sounds of a guy grunting in a constant rhythm. My cock throbbed again and I was almost able to turn and leave. If I had, I wouldn't be telling my story, obviously.

The basement was one large room, lights low. A large bed in the center and a few chairs and other furniture scattered around. There were four or five guys standing around, both skinny and fat, a couple sat in chairs. They all had their cocks in hand and watched the action on the bed.

Laid back on the bed was a woman who looked kinda familiar. She was huge, massive tits spilled down her sides, her bulging gut making her look several feet wide. I froze at the foot of the steps as she spread her legs and I saw her messy, hairy crotch.

Sperm was all over her pubes and leaking from her vagina. Dark hairs matted her large, floppy labia. A pool of cum had formed where her huge ass met the bed. “Come on, next motherfucker step up!” She bellowed to the room and I watched as one of the dudes climbed on top of her and entered her quickly.

The urge to run was overpowering, almost, but I couldn't look away. I'd not seen anything like this, not even back in my crazy youth. The guy on top banged away at her. His dark cock wasn't that big from what I saw, and I suspected he was mostly fucking her fat thighs. He plowed her for maybe thirty seconds before grunting and shouting and coming to rest between the woman's legs. Then he was quickly off, pulled up his pants, and headed up the stairs.

“Next motherfucker!”

Another guy mounted her, his cock a bit longer and he was soon pumping away in the woman's cunt, quickly squirting his load and leaving. I watched unable to move and had a growing suspicion that I knew the woman somehow. A new dude replaced the last and it didn't take long for another load to fire into her sloppy, overflowing cunt.

Tony leaned over to me grinning, “Well, Ham, ever seen any shit like this, man? This shit is crazy-yo. Meet 'The Big Ride.' That's what they call her, likes to come up here sometimes and take as many brothers loads in her pussy as she can. Got like a dozen kids or something, doubt she knows who's the fathers. Prolly don't even know the father's names. The Big Ride, that's what they call her, you can see why, yeah? Think her real name's Lotta or some shit, nobody ever calls her that though, she been around here forever and I never heard anyone call her that.”

Lotta... Holy Shit!, I thought. Lotta. That's why she looked familiar, why I thought I knew her. Lotta was my girlfriend in 9^th grade. She was younger than me by two years, thirteen at the time, and lived just across the line dividing school districts. Lotta was the first girl to suck my cock. The first girl I fucked. The first girl I came inside. I was her first, too. She was skinny then, too skinny, but pretty. Hot, even. Tightest fucking pussy I've ever had. Nubs for tits, puffy and chocolate brown. She was introverted when she wasn't with me, shy and quiet.

Yet, there she was, on her back in a basement, huge as hell, demanding random dudes fuck her and pump her full of jizz. What the fuck happened? As I saw another guy laying over her, putting his long, thick cock in Lotta's cunt, I realized I was hard as fuck. My dick was jumping and part of me wanted to pull it out and stroke it like the rest of the dudes were doing. I was horny, nervous, horrified.

I realized it was just me and Tony standing around at this point, watching a guy grunting his load into Lotta.

Tony had his cock out by now and was the next guy to mount Lotta, leaving just the three of us. The mess between her legs was ridiculous. Sperm covered her hairy crotch, her inner thighs, and had pooled into a sticky puddle between her legs. I started to leave, to get away before I gave in, wanted to be strong enough. I should be turned off. Huge women weren't my thing, the sloppy woman's sperm-filled cunt didn't turn me on, but I was fucking horny. Too horny. I really need to cum and I drunkenly accepted where I'd shoot my load.

Tony shouted as he fucked Lotta, “Take it, Big Ride. Take that big fucking cock in that nasty pussy. I'm cumming, Big Ride. That's right. Take. My. Fucking. Jizz!” He spasmed against her as he unloaded, adding to the mess in Lotta's cunt. Sliding off, he looked at me. “Fuck. I know, brother, I know. Fucking nasty as hell, but damn, I blow my nuts every time.” He nodded in Lotta's direction, “You gonna take a turn?”

He smiled when I didn't answer, heading toward the stairs. “Well, better decide quick, I'm sure the next round of dudes is on the way, and you might not get another shot. Some of them fuck her for hours.”

He left me alone with Lotta. She stared at me, legs splayed, messy, hairy cunt covered with a thick layer of cum. She breathed heavily and motioned me to come to her. “Come on, motherfucker, you gonna hit this or do I have to go find someone who actually has a fucking dick?” I wasn't sure if she recognized me at all. It had been a long time since we'd seen each other. I was pretty sure I didn't look nearly as different as an adult as she did, but maybe after so many dudes had fucked her over the years, she had long forgotten her first.

My mind raced. My head turned toward the stairs, my feet frozen to the floor. I tried to leave, knew I had to leave. I couldn't let my cock control me. I couldn't cheat on my wife and family.

My cock won. I still don't know why, but it did. Well, I know why, and that weakness still scares the shit out of me.

I pulled off my pants and pulled my cock through the front of my boxers. I knew the risks and dangers of what I was going to do and for the moment, I didn't give a fuck. I had to fuck Lotta again, even if she was the opposite of the skinny hot young teen I'd screwed so long ago.

I slid onto the bed and between her legs. I tried to ignore the pooling cum that splashed against my legs, warm and sticky. I stroked my hard cock a couple of times and slid it to her semen-covered opening. Lotta lay back, like she had for everyone else, and I penetrated her, my cock rooting in her cunt while my balls rested against her massive cum-covered ass cheeks.

To say she was loose would be an understatement. Barely half my cock felt like it was in contact with her insides as I slid in. Rivers of cum pushed out as I entered, the remains of the many anonymous loads that had been squirted inside her pussy. My groin pressed against her messy, hairy crotch, her huge labia spread wide enough to touch my thighs.

My cock jumped in her and despite the wave of disgust I felt for what I was doing. I could feel my load building and churning. I leaned over top of her and started pounding. I had to slam her hard to feel much friction, the combination of her very loose vagina and numerous loads leaving her channel wide and gaping. Bigger dicks than mine had been inside her earlier, and that didn't help at all.

My load was stuck in a bit of an in-between state, ready to blow, but needing more pressure to do it. Knowing what my wife needed to get her to clench her channel, Haney a bit loose from giving birth several times, I reached down and found Lotta's soft clit, hidden under a large flap of skin that was her hood. I stroked my fingers across the nub and felt it spring up and quickly rise against my touch. Her pussy didn't exactly grip my cock, but I felt the channel close slightly, pushing out more sperm. My dick came to life as well, I could feel my shaft touching the walls of her vagina more firmly, and I knew my seed was about to blow.

Lotta moaned, the first sound I'd heard from her that wasn't grunting, panting, or shouting for someone to mount her. She moaned again as I stroked her clit and I felt her huge thighs tense and rise. She quickly was writhing under me, her cunt growing slightly firmer once more, almost gripping my cock. Lotta bucked, a shudder jiggling her massive tits and her rolls of fat. Again she bucked, cried out, shuddered, and climaxed. “wwwwWHHOOOOAAA... wwwwWHHOOOAAA... WOOOHHH... WHHOOFUUUUCKGODDAMN... wwwuuuhOOOH... wwwwuuuhOOOH...”

Her vagina rocked and clenched, almost squeezing my dick, her massive arms rising up to grasp at my chest. I exploded inside her sloppy cunt, firing my load of sperm into the pooling semen in her channel. I cried out and banged harder, Lotta jiggling in orgasm below me. I grunted, unloading my nuts in the big woman, thrashing against her spermy groin as I squirted shot after shot into her snatch. My cock twitched, firing again into her depths, planting my cum deep in her cavernous pussy.

I came to rest on top of her, completely drained. Semen drooled out of her cunt around my penis and we both breathed heavily for a moment. “Goddamn, goddamn! Whoa... Fucking been a long fucking time since I got that. Long fucking time. You hit my spot just right, just right. Damn, motherfucker, you gotta come ride The Big Ride more often!”

My guilt washed over me, painful and heavy. I'd just cheated on my wife, cum inside this woman after she'd been fucked by countless other dudes. I hadn't even worn a condom. I felt sick, ashamed, nauseous. I slid from her body and quickly had my pants up, heading for the stairs.

“Next time you come 'round, Ham... you do me right, again, yeah?”

I ran. Lotta had recognized me and that just made things worse, somehow. I called one of the few cab companies that would come into the hood and got the fuck back to my hotel.

I never told my wife. Never told anyone. Tony knew, of course, but he didn't give a shit. I somehow managed to play calm and normal with Haney when I got home, but inside, I was torn up and feeling terrible. It took months before I started feeling ok again, but that night, fucking Lotta, has never left my thoughts and I pray desperately that Haney never finds out.

I'm never going back to Pittsburgh again if I can help it. Never looking up Tony. Never going by to my hood. It was all ruined, all washed away by shame and fear and weakness. I'll never go back there and risk what I dread most, that, despite the shame and the fear, I'd fuck Lotta again if I had the chance.

Goddammit.